My soul longs to break free; to soar above the sky or... to dance in the rain :) But lately, it's losing its vitality and resulted in my first minor breakdown since I moved here. My subconscious would like to degrade it to Monday blues, but who am I kidding.
It all started with a slight discomfort of being taken advantaged of at work. I wish I had a stronger character and would stand up for myself, but because of my meekness, I was drowned in piles and piles of work, rushing to meet deadlines after deadlines. Working for more than two full weeks, trapped in my little dorm drove me crazy. I was so caught up with work that even my mind and body protested against me---I had my first work-related dream and fell sick over the week.
I felt like I was losing my sense of balance. Work was taking up a huge portion of my time and, basically, I have no life. I took a step back to reflect upon the way I was living and tried to spice up my life! I'm proud to say that I'm progressing! I've been spending more time with friends; visited a few beaches to brush up on my almost-non-existent photography skills; bought a practice pad and a pair of drumsticks to learn a few rudiments; picked up Rick Warren's Purpose Driven Life; and the list goes on.
What was more mind boggling was the fact that I felt mentally drained because my output and input is greatly disproportionate in certain aspects of my life. For example, I've recently transformed into a magnet that attracts people who expects me to do things for them under unreasonable circumstances without the tiniest hint of consideration. I'm more than willing to lend a helping hand whenever needed but the attitude and frequency of these requests make me question the necessity of my compliance with someone who clearly doesn't appreciate my effort. I've been trying to soak in the idea that "being at a disadvantageous position is actually advantageous" (rough translation of 吃虧＝佔便宜) but it's a hard concept to grasp. I'm still learning.
Well, that's that. It's been a rough week but I survived with the grace of God, so yeap, it's all good!
